this is as intimidating as making the first entry in a new journal. the pages crisp and new, the edges straight and clean, giving off the ever-so gentle scent of potential. possibility is in the air, my friends. and suddenly, every thought in my head crumbles. nothing sounds good enough to put down in print. as soon as it is released, it feels permanent. as if i can't get it back. with the fear of being misunderstood, i build up all these expectations in my head that everything that is said has to be perfect, neat, put-together, creative, and exact.
i don't think my life is any more significant than those around me. but, i do believe that life in and of itself is important. so, i will attempt to capture the essence of life as it happens. in hints of conversation, glimpses of color, sights of love, and sounds of hearts breaking. this is one of my stones of remembrance: i want to remember what happens in and around me, and i desperately want to be changed because of it.
to introduce myself, i am a small-town girl from missouri who recently moved to tennessee. i lived there for a year, fell in love with the mountains, and even more so with the people there. to look up and see the stars everyday, to gaze at the wondrous beauty of hills and trees and green, to hear the sounds of birds and crickets... simple signs of wonder. relationships were built and bridged, and all of them pushed me to do things that scare me. things like go to chicago and admit myself into grad school. which, as of two days ago, i attempted. and i am doing it.
this coming tuesday marks the beginning of the next two years of my life: school. learning, studying, reading, creating, paper-writing, all-nighters, and lots of coffee-drinking. to say that i'm excited is an understatement, but to not mention nervous, apprehensive, and uncertain would be lying. am i going to fail? what if i get mugged? will i find a community of like-minded and like-hearted people? do i belong here? will the city get the best of me? is it ok to be separated from everyone i know and trust during what looks to be the most difficult two years of my life?
i don't have any answers... i rarely do. but, what i know for certain is that i'm not playing it safe. i'm jumping in head first. how i will land, i'm not sure.
i don't think my life is any more significant than those around me. but, i do believe that life in and of itself is important. so, i will attempt to capture the essence of life as it happens. in hints of conversation, glimpses of color, sights of love, and sounds of hearts breaking. this is one of my stones of remembrance: i want to remember what happens in and around me, and i desperately want to be changed because of it.
to introduce myself, i am a small-town girl from missouri who recently moved to tennessee. i lived there for a year, fell in love with the mountains, and even more so with the people there. to look up and see the stars everyday, to gaze at the wondrous beauty of hills and trees and green, to hear the sounds of birds and crickets... simple signs of wonder. relationships were built and bridged, and all of them pushed me to do things that scare me. things like go to chicago and admit myself into grad school. which, as of two days ago, i attempted. and i am doing it.
this coming tuesday marks the beginning of the next two years of my life: school. learning, studying, reading, creating, paper-writing, all-nighters, and lots of coffee-drinking. to say that i'm excited is an understatement, but to not mention nervous, apprehensive, and uncertain would be lying. am i going to fail? what if i get mugged? will i find a community of like-minded and like-hearted people? do i belong here? will the city get the best of me? is it ok to be separated from everyone i know and trust during what looks to be the most difficult two years of my life?
i don't have any answers... i rarely do. but, what i know for certain is that i'm not playing it safe. i'm jumping in head first. how i will land, i'm not sure.
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